HEADPHONES

Nelson Mandella moves to China. One morning his doorbell rings. He answers the door to a little Chinese guy with a pile of tyres pointing to a clipboard saying- "Harro, dewiverly, prease sign" Mr Mandella replies "Sorry, I think you've got the wrong address" Next day, same thing happens. DING DONG....Opens the door and same guy with a pile of brake discs "Harro, dewiverly, prease sign" Mandella again politely says "Sorry, I think you've got the wrong address" Next morning. DING DONG "Harro, dewiverly, pree" Mandella irately interrupts "I TOLD YOU.....YOU GOT THE WRONG ADDRESS!" The little Chinese guy looks confused and replies "But everlybordy terra me you isa NISSAN MAINDEALER"

A man is cupping his hand to scoop water from a Scottish Highland Spring. A gamekeeper shouts, "Dinnae drunk tha waater! Et's foo ae coo's sheet an pish!" The man replies, "my good fellow, I'm from England, could you repeat that in proper English for me?" The gamekeeper replies " I said use 2 hands - you spill less that way"

On a serious note, I had this problem at work. Coz the bonnet is warm the cat got into the habbit of sitting on it . Kept a sports bottle of water in the car. When parked up sprayed the bonnet to wet it. After a while the cat gets out of the habbit and finds a new car to squat on Make sure the wax is topped up so the water beads nicely and takes longer to dry out. Sports cap on bottle needed to give a spray effect. Tried normal bottle and the water just sheeted off leaving a dry bonnet Good luck

UK Grime track for you street fighter fans http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xF1IH0rEuk4

You must be loving the summer we're having in your shiney drop top

Welcome Meets are defo the way to go to help decide what bits you like

I know of a guy who lives in a massive house but in winter only heats/uses one room. Bought a new 911 but never uses it coz it's too heavy on petrol. He's now thinking of selling his house for 1.5 mil to gwt a bigger place Probably gonna sell his 5yr old 911 for a BIGGER engined car to NOT use at his new house that he will NOT use either What's the point I say if you can afford your toys comfortably enjoy them

I would hate to think another 350z owner is the culprit Hope no other damage was done during it's removal.

Was researching a new phone and found this vid

It was nice to meet some new faces today. Despite the recent bad weather all were surprisingly clean and shiney. Big respect to those that came from out of town

Well done for sticking to your guns

Very happy for you. Sounds like this GM has found a good home and a caring owner. I dread the days in the future when inevitably we'll see unloved zeds being driven into the ground and being left to rot Your choice of smiley was perfect ( )

No mods that i could see. Overheard service desk saying he was collecting car on Monday otherwise I would of hung around to say hello.

Gorgeous Something about black zeds, remind me of "TIE FIGHTER PILOTS" from Star Wars

Not custom paint but the interlagos one.......I just forgot the proper paint name .

Very impressive results I wonder whether the cloudy headlights are caused by UV damage too or whether it's just regular swirlage. Seen similar effects on mine.

Went in for a service and spotted your car.

Another from me. A proper "chariot", Ben Hur aggresiveness. When your average motorists see that nose in the rear view it will be like the parting of the waves to let you through

Good to have you on board

The red reflections in the paint set it off nicely too

Cool stuff indeed

Parked up next to you at Cheetham Hill in a sunset coupe

Love reading owner's mini tests like these. I will look out for your updates with interest. Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences

I've been traumatised by past events when 2yrs ago guy booted in my front door while i was away. Only turned over the hallway before neighbours disturbed them. Obvioudely looking for the zeds keys But a big to my neighbour. Most wouldn't do anything.

Whenever I go away, even for just a weekend, and the Zed is home alone I get mega paranoid. Here's a few things I do out of fear. Leave the fuel tank low so TWOCER has to fill up soon and hopefuly get spotted at a gas station sooner Leave a similar but WRONG locking nut in ash tray. When going for the rims TWOCER spends longer in the dark trying to seat the locking nut instead of going straight to his nut remover tool. Car keys on sideboard (out of view of letterbox not to tempt fate) However the Nissan key is not for the zed and the disclock key is for a different one to that on the zeds wheel. Hopefully even more time spent fumbling around in the cockpit before resorting to wrecking thr dash to hotwire it. After all that, I only went and left the interior light on for 2 days while I went away to London Talk about a beacon alerting people to a zed left HOME ALONE