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Kids


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Kids my choice or go and speak to past me and shake me!  

54 members have voted

  1. 1. Is it selfish not to have children?

    • Yes
      3
    • No
      44
    • Hypothetically speaking (and the poll is private) would you go back in time and have a little talk with yourself and say 'listen don't splash the baby gravy'
      2
    • Do you feel that all you are now is a glorified child minder?
      1
    • I'm definitely never, ever going to have children, the thought makes my bones shiver.
      9


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Im 35,wife 33...being together 15 years,married 9....Don't want children yet,no paranoia that we may get old and miss out! If it happens it happens !

May even adapt one day,we are very open minded! Your life ,your decisions,most importantly you need to enjoy it !

My zed is our baby at the moment,always crying for some TLC...))

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If you have managed to do everything you have done and you're happy with your contribution to the upbringing then I take my hat off to you. Well done.

 

It wasn't / is not easy, but I've managed and still managing, while I don't feel any pressure or that I lost my "freedom". I see many of you here complaining of the sleep deprivation when / if you become a parent. Since I was a teenager, I always slept 3-5 hours max a night. I hate the idea that I'm wasting my life sleeping, while I have so many things to do before I leave this life :lol: I feel like I'm 97 years old and I'm running out of time with a huge list of to do tasks. :lol: Sleep is not important at all to me, I'm used to this kind of schedule and I don't feel tired or sleep deprived.

I'm an workaholic too, with the immigrant mentality where you have to catch up with the local chaps and succeed, no matter the cost :lol: So my brain is wired for WORK, WORK and more WORK :lol:

 

I retract my earlier statement about being lucky, you are the odd one....... You sleep half of what a normal person does, work from home (assumption) and love work..... Well right there you have 6 hours per day more than everyone else. Trying everything in 12 hours not your usual 18-20 ;)

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I think I feel the way about cats that you guys feel about kids.

 

I couldn't imagine my life without them.

They're the first thing I think about when I wake, and the last thing before I sleep.

I'm so proud of their every achievement.

They make me laugh and smile more than anything else in the world.

I would rather spend an hour with them than a week with a supermodel.

Cleaning up after them is never fun, but worth the smell.

 

You can come and look after our 3 cats. I hate them!

 

All they do is moan that they want feeding, trash the carpets/sofa, throw up all over the place, do endless amount of dumps/wee`s in their trays and for fun they now take it in turns to trash the kitchen. Not only that, you cant cook anything without them trying to swipe it away from you. One of our cats has now realised that rather than try and swipe food off your plate, its easier and much more productive to just slice your hand open as you carry the the plate, then that way you are likely to drop the entire plate & contents on the floor, giving him much more chance to get the grub.

 

Then when you think it cant get any worse they get ill and the vet robs you off nearly £900 just to tell you he`s got no idea what was wrong with the cat but he`s perfectly fine now.

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I think I feel the way about cats that you guys feel about kids.

 

I couldn't imagine my life without them.

They're the first thing I think about when I wake, and the last thing before I sleep.

I'm so proud of their every achievement.

They make me laugh and smile more than anything else in the world.

I would rather spend an hour with them than a week with a supermodel.

Cleaning up after them is never fun, but worth the smell.

 

Cats couldn't give a monkeys backside about you, they use you for food and a place to defecate. If they could open tins, they would call out a hitman and have you done over in the blink of an eye and inherit all your stuff. They take away your freedom, you have to constantly feed them and clean up after them, hair everywhere, I just couldn't imagine anything worse...

 

...I have never owned a cat.

 

Sounds like kids to me.

 

...I have never owned a kid.

 

I was hoping the inherent sarcasm in my post would get noticed without the need for a winking smiley ;)

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If you have managed to do everything you have done and you're happy with your contribution to the upbringing then I take my hat off to you. Well done.

 

It wasn't / is not easy, but I've managed and still managing, while I don't feel any pressure or that I lost my "freedom". I see many of you here complaining of the sleep deprivation when / if you become a parent. Since I was a teenager, I always slept 3-5 hours max a night. I hate the idea that I'm wasting my life sleeping, while I have so many things to do before I leave this life :lol: I feel like I'm 97 years old and I'm running out of time with a huge list of to do tasks. :lol: Sleep is not important at all to me, I'm used to this kind of schedule and I don't feel tired or sleep deprived.

I'm an workaholic too, with the immigrant mentality where you have to catch up with the local chaps and succeed, no matter the cost :lol: So my brain is wired for WORK, WORK and more WORK :lol:

 

I retract my earlier statement about being lucky, you are the odd one....... You sleep half of what a normal person does, work from home (assumption) and love work..... Well right there you have 6 hours per day more than everyone else. Trying everything in 12 hours not your usual 18-20 ;)

 

I'm living the dream, so to speak. I love what I'm doing, love my work, love my family, love my hobbies, love my friends, love my customers, but I hate the weather! :lol: :lol: Of course there's always room for better, but there's still time... (or not?) :lol:

 

Anyway, you lazy bastard! :lol: :lol: Any track days booked this year? I need to catch up with you! :D

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If you have managed to do everything you have done and you're happy with your contribution to the upbringing then I take my hat off to you. Well done.

 

It wasn't / is not easy, but I've managed and still managing, while I don't feel any pressure or that I lost my "freedom". I see many of you here complaining of the sleep deprivation when / if you become a parent. Since I was a teenager, I always slept 3-5 hours max a night. I hate the idea that I'm wasting my life sleeping, while I have so many things to do before I leave this life :lol: I feel like I'm 97 years old and I'm running out of time with a huge list of to do tasks. :lol: Sleep is not important at all to me, I'm used to this kind of schedule and I don't feel tired or sleep deprived.

I'm an workaholic too, with the immigrant mentality where you have to catch up with the local chaps and succeed, no matter the cost :lol: So my brain is wired for WORK, WORK and more WORK :lol:

 

I retract my earlier statement about being lucky, you are the odd one....... You sleep half of what a normal person does, work from home (assumption) and love work..... Well right there you have 6 hours per day more than everyone else. Trying everything in 12 hours not your usual 18-20 ;)

 

I'm living the dream, so to speak. I love what I'm doing, love my work, love my family, love my hobbies, love my friends, love my customers, but I hate the weather! :lol: :lol: Of course there's always room for better, but there's still time... (or not?) :lol:

 

Anyway, you lazy bastard! :lol: :lol: Any track days booked this year? I need to catch up with you! :D

 

I love being lazy :) Im even moving closer to work so I dont have to take a train - although, technically thats to save train costs, not deal with people on trains and not deal with train companies.

 

Not yet.... should be getting the MX5 back this weekend (with the addition of an oil cooler, some new harnesses, new clutch and flywheel, supercharger) :) Will book some up as soon as its back! Hoping for Thruxton on April 15th or somewhere near that date

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Some of you guys must have had a really bad life experience growing up. You talk about kids like they are some sort of diseases and like you've never been a child.

 

No, some of us already dont have enough time to run their lives without having kids to look after.

Some of us have careers that mean if we did have kids they would be in childcare 80% of the time, and a lot of us dont have the support network that allows us to dump them off with someone at 3 hours notice else while we visit 30 countries or go to 100's of concerts.

 

Me and the Missus would really like a dog but we dont have one as we dont have the time to care for it (we are both out from 0800 to 1900 at least and away at weekends a lot) .......... do I have to complete the sentence? We have also worked damn hard to get to a point where we can afford to do what we want, when we want an Id like to enjoy that for a bit before taking on additional responsibility.

 

Its great to see you have had an amazing experience and continue to do so, but its also pretty clear that you arent the average parent in the average situation, and I dont think its fair to assume everyone else is the same.

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  • 3 weeks later...

So as of 5AM today I can safely say having a little life that is purly dependent on you does changes your prespective on life.

 

Is it the best feeling in world - may be not, but there is definitely no other feeling/experience like it.

 

Oh I'm also so glad men cannot get pregnant, I've seen my fair share of blood/gore/horrofic medical stuff etc in A&E, but nothing quite comes close to labour!!!

 

Still cannot praise the midwifed and junior doctor that looked after us enough. I honestly don't think we could have had better care anywhere else in the world, regardless of how much £££ your health care insurance is.....Now, need the work out which way is the front/back of a nappy :).

Edited by gangzoom
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Man you lot are so negative... Where do I start lol

 

I can't understand the comments about hating kids or babies- you were there yourselves at one point. Imagine if everyone around you at that time was as negative

 

If your parents had the same mentality you wouldn't be here today

 

I have a big close nit family. My parents have 11 grandchildren. My dad doesn't keep too well and we all rally round to make him as comfortable as possible. Imagine he had no kids or grand kids to help him out

 

How would you guys feel if when your older your partner kicks the bucket and you have no one around you? That's what families are for I couldn't imagine my life without one

 

Imagine times like Christmas without any family

 

Less than a week ago I welcomed my second daughter into the world. Can't put into words how happy it made me only a parent would understand

 

But it won't stop me doing the things I enjoy- iv just ordered a brand new car which will arrive in a month and I will be starting my project car this spring as well. Both cars are 2 door coupes

 

It's really not as bad as it sounds :lol:

 

Yeah I was a baby. I was also an awful teenager. But I don't have time for either of them now!

 

My parents hated each other. They also hated me because they were so strung out! I'm still here!

 

I have a big ish family but none of us see each other. We all love within a couple of miles of each other.

 

I looked after my mum while she was dying of cancer and when she died my brother stepped in and took the credit.

 

I'm pretty sure I'll have no one around me to look after me when I get older. My current relationship is well and truly on the rocks!

 

My parents and brother were/are Jehovahs Witnesses. No Christmas. No Birthdays. No celebration of any kind.

 

Good that you're in a position where you CAN still afford things. All my friends who had kids are so so so poor because of it. They live off smart price pot noodles and the like. They all work. I think unless you're approaching or above middle class then having children is just procreation for the sake of it. Not because you can afford to give the child everything it deserves and not be stressed to the eyeballs with money worries and argue like mad in front of them and actually WANT to welcome a child made with love between you and your partner.

 

My parents were middle class but loathed each other.

 

I think I'm just not a family guy. It's never shown any positive things to me. Only misery.

Edited by TT350
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Sorry to hear things weren't easy for you mate

 

I was blessed with parents who loved us all and I want to do the same for mine. But hearing stories like yours makes me appreciate more what I had sometimes we take things for granted

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It's not selfish to not have kids. It's selfish to have kids and not look after them properly.

 

In its most fatalistic sense, the point of life is to pass on your genetic information before the "programmed obselesence" of evolution kills you off. In the philosophical sense, you get one chance at life and at happiness so do what you like with what time you have.

 

Kids change people, mostly for the better but occasionally there are people who will continue to be arseholes long after they've sired offspring. There are also people who will never have kids and be better \ no better for it.

 

We live in an era where we don't need to have kids in order for someone to look after us in our dotage & attitudes are changing to accept that some people just don't want children and will never have them.

 

There's no shortage of children in the world, therefore no biological imperative to maintain the populace.

 

Just my tuppence.

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  • 4 weeks later...

One month in to having to look after a dependent. It's hard work at times, but not as bad as I had imagined.

 

Actually thinking about booking first holiday aboard with our daughter end of the year....and the Tesla fund is 100% intact, if anything my wife is now getting excited about it, or maybe she cannot wait to see the Leaf go :).

 

In short I still don't think it's selfish not to have kids, but having a kid isn't as hard/bad/expensive as I had thought....Actually quite enjoying it so far!!

Edited by gangzoom
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