Ekona

So if you've done well for yourself, you can't be gutted that you damaged something you love? People felt terrible for Rowan Atkinson when he binned his F1, but we're comfortable ripping into this guy because we don't like his style? Nope, I'm not having that as being remotely fair.

Every now and then, I like to shake things up a little and keep people on their toes

Me three, it's genuinely ace.

And yet, if this was Ken Block or Masato Kawabata* or Lewis Hamilton or someone people actually related to on here, there wouldn't be half as much grief. Bloody hell, the guy made a mistake and no-one was hurt. The story is semi-believable (although I do think it's the truth, I also think it may have been stretched slightly!) and the police have zero interest in taking it any further, so what's the problem? Blimey, I hope no-one on here ever makes a mistake and bins their car: I assume you'll want the police to come down like a ton of bricks on you then as well. I don't like Grimmy's presenting, his style does not appeal to me at all. However, I'd be gutted if that was me who'd just had a whack like that in my P&J, so I'll show a bit of human compassion and feel sorry for the guy. *Yes, I googled that one, I'm not that cool!

Indeed. Take the points, the fine, and move on. Unless you've got a spare £10K to throw at a lawyer, you ain't winning this one.

*pats dirty great V8 car with a manual 'box*

*tyres

Instant throttle response? Anything with a drive by wire throttle. I think I know why I don't like EVs. They're like a worse diesel: So much grunt low down gives you no reason to thrape the nuts off it, which is what sporty driving is all about.

Nope. They look stupid.

Always centre. Only Alfas are allowed side mounted plates.

I assume everyone I meet is a muppet, until they prove to me otherwise.

You would think so, wouldn't you?

Exactly. Grip above all other considerations.

Just send an email, like normal people do.

Mate, I know you love these, but could not at least get it in an actual colour? That is as close to white goods in a car as I ever think will be possible

Did you drive past me on your way out of the gym yesterday? I was in the black Impreza waiting to come out of a side road as you want past me, literally 200 yards up from the gym exit.

Now if they can just find a way to make them not look quite like such a sodding ecobox, they might be on to something.

Aye, 'tis true.

Your gearbox will last longer than his

Or turn the aircon off! ...You did have the AC off, didn't you? You're going to kick yourself now if you didn't

Easier said than done, but never rise to it. You may well be bigger than him, but that's not going to help if he pulls out a blade or a gun. But yeah, some people are proper nobbers.

Revup is 296bhp, not 300. Brillo is spot on though, different dyno on a different day will give you a different result. You could gain the equivalent of that 'missing' 4bhp by having a good poo and clearing the rubbish out the boot before driving, if you're that keen.

Yeah, I'm a saddo The right wheels then, consider that comment retracted

Go get your tools back. That'll make you feel better.

Don't blame me for your crap driving