Flex Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Just pondering on the thought of if I was married and had a joint account Could I have slipped my couple of modifications through under the radar? ....................... Err NO springs to mind - NO CHANCE IN HELL Well when we got together some 22 + years ago I was always overdrawn had no decent money management whatsoever if I wanted it I bought it if I couldn't afford it I financed it loans, loans and more loans, then bigger loans to pay of the smaller loans and buy something else - Then along she comes of course for the first year or so it was just the start of the relation ship and we did what most new couples do, when we moved in together we got a joint account and both our wages went in to it. She did (still does) all the money management, got me back in the black - yes I had to cut back on some of the toys or at least wait a while for them after a couple of years I would tell her what I wanted she would tell me if I could afford afford it - Worked and still works brilliantly - Can I take my bike test and have a CBR600 ??? - Yes Can I get a CBR900RR Fireblade - YES GSXRK1000 ??? Yes OK A Porsche 911 ? - Yes you get the idea I have a great wife, 2 great Kids a nice house and still have some great AWESOME toys - got the borrowing down to the essentials - House that sort of thing - only buy toys when I can afford them - no financing of toys anymore (or there would be a Lambo on the drive ) Holidays - whats one of them then??? If she want's something she gets it, if I want something I get it - we ask each other but I think that's more out of respect We can afford it or we can't Can I buy seven cars on the trot? yes! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATTAK Z Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Just pondering on the thought of if I was married and had a joint account Could I have slipped my couple of modifications through under the radar? ....................... Err NO springs to mind - NO CHANCE IN HELL Well when we got together some 22 + years ago I was always overdrawn had no decent money management whatsoever if I wanted it I bought it if I couldn't afford it I financed it loans, loans and more loans, then bigger loans to pay of the smaller loans and buy something else - Then along she comes of course for the first year or so it was just the start of the relation ship and we did what most new couples do, when we moved in together we got a joint account and both our wages went in to it. She did (still does) all the money management, got me back in the black - yes I had to cut back on some of the toys or at least wait a while for them after a couple of years I would tell her what I wanted she would tell me if I could afford afford it - Worked and still works brilliantly - Can I take my bike test and have a CBR600 ??? - Yes Can I get a CBR900RR Fireblade - YES GSXRK1000 ??? Yes OK A Porsche 911 ? - Yes you get the idea I have a great wife, 2 great Kids a nice house and still have some great AWESOME toys - got the borrowing down to the essentials - House that sort of thing - only buy toys when I can afford them - no financing of toys anymore (or there would be a Lambo on the drive ) Holidays - whats one of them then??? If she want's something she gets it, if I want something I get it - we ask each other but I think that's more out of respect We can afford it or we can't So Sad ... live the dream man whilst you've got chance !!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATTAK Z Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Just pondering on the thought of if I was married and had a joint account Could I have slipped my couple of modifications through under the radar? ....................... Err NO springs to mind - NO CHANCE IN HELL Well when we got together some 22 + years ago I was always overdrawn had no decent money management whatsoever if I wanted it I bought it if I couldn't afford it I financed it loans, loans and more loans, then bigger loans to pay of the smaller loans and buy something else - Then along she comes of course for the first year or so it was just the start of the relation ship and we did what most new couples do, when we moved in together we got a joint account and both our wages went in to it. She did (still does) all the money management, got me back in the black - yes I had to cut back on some of the toys or at least wait a while for them after a couple of years I would tell her what I wanted she would tell me if I could afford afford it - Worked and still works brilliantly - Can I take my bike test and have a CBR600 ??? - Yes Can I get a CBR900RR Fireblade - YES GSXRK1000 ??? Yes OK A Porsche 911 ? - Yes you get the idea I have a great wife, 2 great Kids a nice house and still have some great AWESOME toys - got the borrowing down to the essentials - House that sort of thing - only buy toys when I can afford them - no financing of toys anymore (or there would be a Lambo on the drive ) Holidays - whats one of them then??? If she want's something she gets it, if I want something I get it - we ask each other but I think that's more out of respect We can afford it or we can't So Sad ... live the dream man whilst you've got chance !!! Only Joking haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ekona Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 I wanted to buy an M3. Jo convinced me to buy the 911. That's why we're still together Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keyser Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Actually I lied - I will have a nice house when it's not a f'ing building site and we actually get it finished O the better half also said I forgot 2 Jetski's a pickup truck and more recently an MNR then a Radical 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bockaaarck Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 You are very lucky Chris 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gangzoom Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 (edited) We go by the view all the money we earn is 'our' money, but we both have separate accounts. I'm awful at saving, and really good at spending on pointless stuff....as Mitz will tell you by the amount of un-nessary £££ parts I keep on buying for the BMW and asking him to stick on . So I made the decision even before we were married that I'll pretty much pay all the bills/mortgage etc, and any amount left at the end of the month I move to a 'savings account'. This means that she can save nearly her entire salary (which is basically the same as mine), and pay for the really big stuff...like lump sum mortgage overpayments, in a few months time a new car to replace the Civic , in a few years time a scary amount of deposit for the next 'final' family house, and may be one day a Tesla S....Sadly I fear my 'savings account' will not really contribute much to any of those things, not unless I can find a way to doge the 'car modification' tax .... Edited October 29, 2014 by gangzoom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JetSet Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 We have separate accounts, had before we married, still have them now. I pay some of the bills, the better half pays others. This ^^^^^^^^^^^^ Pete Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martinmac Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 If Mitz was on here when I started modding he would have retired by now. As said, internet banking is very handy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jollyranchers Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 We have our own separate accounts, I have no idea how much she has in her's and I'm sure she has no idea whats in mine. We pay the mortgage out of the mortgae savings account, I pay the household bills, water, gas, electric, telephone broadband,insurance, etc and run the car, she pays the Council Tax and buys the food, I have no idea if one is paying more than the other as its not important, and we split holidays, This is the way to do it !!! works perfectly ! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhackyWill Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 We have our own separate accounts, I have no idea how much she has in her's and I'm sure she has no idea whats in mine. We pay the mortgage out of the mortgae savings account, I pay the household bills, water, gas, electric, telephone broadband,insurance, etc and run the car, she pays the Council Tax and buys the food, I have no idea if one is paying more than the other as its not important, and we split holidays, This is the way to do it !!! works perfectly ! Worked for us for the last 17 years.. !! Never an argument about money, very rarely a discussion about money, we just get on with living, 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bockaaarck Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 (edited) To put things in context. I'm enjoying a lovely Pinot, while wondering about what it must feel like to leave the comfort of planet earth while riding on a Saturn 5 rocket.......my god humanity is wonderful! Edited October 29, 2014 by Bockaaarck 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marzman Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 For us, we split the fixed household bills down the middle, and both only pay enough into the joint account to cover them. We then have our own accounts for our own money. I'm earn about 2.5x more than her. I pickup the tab on all activities, should that be going on holiday, going for a meal or to the cinema etc, and it's my job to save up too. I also buy all the food. Essentially if it's something for 'us', I pay for it. If it's something for her, she pays for it. We're very happy. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarnie Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 (edited) A single joint account?? Are you crackers!?!?!? We have joint account that ALL direct debits come out of, that we both put money in to. However, I earn more than wife so I put in more than twice the amount she does. I don't mind this as I earn more. However, she does ALL of the housework around the house. I don't think I've used a vacuum in a decade or ever ironed any item of clothes. Conversely, my wife has never paid for a takeaway, never pays when we go out and never pays for the hotels or weekends away. I pay for nearly all of holiday costs. She contributes to spending money and stuff as and when. We went to Dubai at the start of the year which cost £5k which I paid for, the Mrs put £300 to the spending money. I don't begrudge her smaller contribution one little bit, just as she appreciates me providing the vast majority of the money for our luxury stuff and doesn't gripe at me for not vacuuming. She don't have it bad anyway, she works five days on and then gets five days off so she has plenty of time to be a lady of leisure, way more than I certainly do!! We both have our own accounts that we buy things from. I don't see it as a trust issue at all, it's not that I don't trust her, I just don't want to feel like I have to ask permission to spend whatever I want on whatever I want. My Wife has no problem what I spend my money on as long as it doesn't impair our quality of life or ability to pay the bills. I'm currently saving for a car, if I was saving that money in our joint account I'm sure she'd suddenly decide that actually we need a kitchen more than I need a car!! Edited October 29, 2014 by Sarnie 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twobears Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 "I just think if you give and give you dont really allow them to fully understand the concept of living in the real world finance wise and to create a rod for your own back." Thankfully Mr TwoBears doesn't think like that or I'd be living in a gutter somewhere, wearing rags and looking forward to my next sip of meths from my brown paper bag We've always had a joint account and credit cards and never had a single argument or even a discussion about money in all the time we've been married. I think that separate accounts are probably more common these days but you have to do what suits you best as a couple. I think I am really spoilt because I get whatever I want, within reason, no questions asked by Mr TwoBears and yet he buys very little for himself other than gadgets. I haven't worked for a couple of years so currently contribute nothing at all to our finances but in the past I have worked my ar$e off and brought in a fairly big chunk of money which allowed us to renovate our house. So I guess we are a good team 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flex Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 MMMmm so you haven't worked for a couple of yrs and 2b has provided for you...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sipar69 Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Don't see the need for joint accounts. We simply sat down one day and worked out who was going to pay for what from our own accounts. If we want to pay for something jointly one us pays and the other one gives their share. As for everything else, I don't care what she does with her money - she earns it and vice versa. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twobears Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Yes, he has and I am very grateful. He earns waaaaay more money than I could ever hope to earn but I'm sure he'd be lonely going on holidays and eating out on his own etc. There again he could always swap me for a younger model ... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarnie Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 (edited) Yes, he has and I am very grateful. He earns waaaaay more money than I could ever hope to earn but I'm sure he'd be lonely going on holidays and eating out on his own etc. There again he could always swap me for a younger model ... One that might be even more 'grateful' Edited October 29, 2014 by Sarnie 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twobears Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Flex, I should add that I only stopped work in the first place because Mr TwoBears asked me to so that I could accompany him on his work-related travels. I took a bit of convincing but he said that he would much prefer to live and work in Europe and have me with him looking after him so that is what I have been doing ever since. We are back in the UK and live down south now (house is in Yorkshire) but he still wants me here so we are renting an apartment close to his office and I spend my time cleaning, ironing, shopping etc but also have plenty of free time to socialise and pursue lots of hobbies. Like I said, it works well for us but I can see that it wouldn't suit everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twobears Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Yes, he has and I am very grateful. He earns waaaaay more money than I could ever hope to earn but I'm sure he'd be lonely going on holidays and eating out on his own etc. There again he could always swap me for a younger model ... One that might be even more 'grateful' Hmm, you might have a point. Maybe I will be ever so 'grateful' tonight. TMI? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flex Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Yes, he has and I am very grateful. He earns waaaaay more money than I could ever hope to earn but I'm sure he'd be lonely going on holidays and eating out on his own etc. There again he could always swap me for a younger model ... One that might be even more 'grateful' Let's be honest they're all grateful when you're paying. Male or female. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bockaaarck Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Annie, good for you and Mr twobears 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HEADPHONES Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Met my missus at 19. Rented a flat together from 21. Married at 22 while I was a student and missus started working. Now 43 with a 6yr old and a 3yr old. Initially we split everything 50:50. Once my career was established when I was 26 I started earning more than the wife and stepped up and paid everything bill wise. Separate accounts with the missus only paying for her personal expenses. Gradually wife worked less as my income was adequate. Still no joint account and just gave her a credit card for her needs and we keep a cash float at home that I keep topped up. She buys whatever she wants/needs but never extravagant without prior consultation. Basically, different arrangements for different circumstances and these can change and evolve as life changes. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiGFoetus Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 We have separate accounts, had before we married, still have them now. I pay some of the bills, the better half pays others. This ^^^^^^^^^^^^ Pete And again. We've never bothered with joint accounts, we split the bills. Now she's currently between roles I just dump enough cash into her account from mine every month to ensure the bills are covered, she has enough money for some fun, but not enough to put us in the poor house. She knows what's in my account and I know what's in hers, so it's kind of a common pool without the need for an additional account. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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