I've cracked it! This was all a conspiracy by Porsche all along.
The time line goes something like this;
The world want to see the 918, La Farrari and the P1 go head to head.
TG inform the world that Ferrari and McLaren won't agree terms, Porsche sit about looking confidently smug.
The world collectively sulks at the prospect this won't happen.
Ferrari and McLaren fold to peer pressure.
TG tell the world this.
Porsche second guess their confidence.
Clarkson et al go filming for a day, Porsche kidnap the hotel's chef, butcher and cows (just to be sure).
Clarkson can't get a steak, acts like a petulant ****; prolonged verbal abuse and a physical altercation follow.
"Clarkson" reports "himself". ;)
BBC investigate, Clarkson is dropped, Porsche return to looking confidently smug.
The only true course of justice here is to forfeit all Porsche products until such a time that Clarkson can get a hot steak... or something.