jim

Click on the forums you are interested in, then use the Cooliris preview function in Firefox to zoom through the posts quickly - saves a lot of time.

My guess is it's been taken in the USA. (rear number plates and other cars look like left hand drives.)

A Nun and a Priest were crossing the Sahara desert on a camel. On the third day out, the camel suddenly dropped dead without warning. After dusting themselves off, the Nun and the Priest surveyed their situation. After a long period of silence, the Priest spoke. Well, Sister, this looks pretty grim.' 'I know, Father. In fact, I don't think it likely that we can survive more than a day or two.' 'I agree,' says the Priest. 'Sister, since we are unlikely to make it out of here alive, would you do something for me?' 'Anything, Father.' 'I have never seen a woman's breasts and I was wondering if I might see yours.' 'Well, under the circumstances I don't see that it would do any harm.' The Nun opened her habit and the Priest enjoyed the sight of her shapely breasts, commenting frequently on their beauty. 'Sister, would you mind if I touched them?' She consented and he fondled them for several minutes. 'Father, could I ask something of you?' 'Yes, Sister?' 'I have never seen a man's penis. Could I see yours?' 'I suppose that would be OK,' the Priest replied lifting his robe. 'Oh Father, may I touch it?' The priest consented and after a few minutes of her fondling he was sporting a huge erection. 'Sister, you know that if I insert my penis in the right place, it can give life.' 'Is that true Father?' 'Yes, it is, Sister.' 'Oh Father, that's wonderful. Stick it in the camel and let's get the hell out of here!'

The Sensitive Man A woman meets a man in a bar. They talk; they connect; they end up leaving together. They get back to his place, and he shows her around his apartment. She notices that one wall of his bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet, cuddly teddy bears. There were three shelves in the bedroom, with hundreds and hundreds of cute, cuddly teddy bears carefully placed in rows, covering the entire wall! It was obvious that he had taken quite some time to lovingly arrange them and she was immediately touched by the amount of thought he had put into organizing the display. There were small bears all along the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears covering the length of the middle shelf, and huge, enormous bears running all the way along the top shelf. She found it strange for an obviously masculine guy to have such a large collection of Teddy Bears. She is quite impressed by his sensitive side, but doesn't mention this to him. They share a bottle of wine and continue talking and, after awhile, she finds herself thinking, "Oh my God! Maybe, this guy could be the one! Maybe he could be the future father of my children?" She turns to him and kisses him lightly on the lips. He responds warmly. They continue to kiss, the passion builds, and he romantically lifts her in his arms and carries her into his bedroom where they rip off each other's clothes and make hot, steamy love. She is so overwhelmed that she responds with more passion, more creativity, more heat than she has ever known. After an intense, explosive night of raw passion with this sensitive guy, they are lying there together in the afterglow. The woman rolls over, gently strokes his chest and asks coyly, "Well, how was it?" The guy gently smiles at her, strokes her cheek, looks deeply into her eyes, and says: . . . . . "Help yourself to any prize from the middle shelf.â€

This one may have been posted before. If so, apologies in advance. A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other of the afterlife. Their biggest fear was that there was no afterlife. After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word he made contact, 'Krista... Krista.. Krista..' 'Is that you, Pete?' 'Yes, I've come back like we agreed.' 'That's wonderful! What's it like?' 'Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple more times. Then I have lunch (you'd be proud of me - lots of greens) another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to the golf course again. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again.' 'Oh, Pete, you surely must be in Heaven!' . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 'Well, not exactly... I'm a rabbit on a golf course in Arizona'

The meanings of key words. 1. Fine. This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 2. Five Minutes. If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five Minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. 3. Nothing. This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. 4. Go Ahead. This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It! 5. Loud Sigh. This isn't actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.) 6. That's Okay. This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 7. Thanks. A woman is thanking you, do not question it. Just say “you're welcomeâ€

Don't hold back, Tere - just say what you really think!

You're just a bit late for the guy from Glasgow (gary stewart) who was looking for a new engine a couple of weeks ago. I think he sourced one already.

My wife had a CRV until recently, and we considered similar options. The new CRV and the Rav4 were both considered but were a bit pricey at the spec we wanted. She ended up with a Qashqai and no regrets so far. It's the 2.0 litre petrol with CVT box. Very smooth and comfortable (her priority as she found the seats of the CRV very firm) with lots of toys in the Acenta spec. There's fewer storage spaces in the front and the boot is smaller. The mpg is not great at 33-35 on average, but is better than she was getting with the CRV. Insurance is a lot cheaper, too.

Thank God for church ladies with word processors. These sentences appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services (Summer, 2007 Release). ---------------------------------------------------------- The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. ---------------------------------------------------------- The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.' -------------------- ------ -------------------------------- Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King. ---------------------------------------------------------- Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. ---------------------------------------------------------- The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict. ---------------------------------------------------------- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you. --------------------------------------------------------- Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help. --------------------------------------------------------- Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. ---------------------------------------------------------- For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. ---------------------------------------------------------- Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get. ---------------------------------------------------------- The Rector will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing: 'Break Forth Into Joy.' --------------------------------------------------------- Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. --------------------------------------------------------- At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice. --------------------------------------------------------- Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. --------------------------------------------------------- Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. --------------------------------------------------------- Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered. --------------------------------------------------------- The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. ------------------------------------------------- Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow. ------------------------------------------------ --------- The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. ----------------------------------- ------ ----------------- This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin . --------------------------------------------------------- Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM . All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done ---------------------------------------------------------- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday. -------------------------------------------- Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door. --------------------------------------------------------- The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy. ---------------------------------------------------------- Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance. ----------------------------------------------------------

Signed. I'm not a great fan of military parades and the like, but a bit of spectacular flying from some of the best pilots in the world will always enhance an event like that. This is just ridiculous.

Not sure I know what you mean - pics?

Hmmm - tempted.

I'm sure you'll get a good few suggestions from the regulars on here.

I've got the Z badges front and back, but I've been toying with the idea of replacing with the large Z on black background. Like these http://www.courtesyparts.com/350z/emblems.html First emblem in 5th section of this page. I think a few others on here have gone for them and they look good on the GM.

That's gotta hurt a bit. .........

Looks great, Trev.

When he says electric seats, I presume he means heated seats? If so, is there any chance they could be made to work in a car with non-heated seats? In other words, is the necessary wiring in place in all cars?

Nice kit, Stew. The big wheels will look very good with it.

Brilliant photos, Stew. You really knocked it off with the weather after all.

"Plug and play into any car battery" Oh yeah! Doubt if it's that straightforward.

Craig. MartinGT has just replaced his exhaust, and he's in the west of Scotland (not too far away from you).

I know bud. Before you wax, after claying you should polish and put sealant on. Claying pulls deposits out of the paintwork and the 'gaps' need protecting ie sealing up again. The only thing to add after wax is a glaze, which would last for just a few hours in reality! But looks when it goes on. Wash - clay - polish - sealant - wax - glaze. Sorry to bump an old thread, but I was about to order Megs glaze as recommended here, and I noticed that in one of the websites it suggested that this product should be applied before waxing, not after it. As I have several layers of P21S already on, I wonder if this glaze product will be of any benefit at all if I apply it now. Depends on the product and what it actually does. Glaze is a bit of a generic term. If it is something that hardens for wax to go on top off, then it can go under it. If not, it goes on top. Ask the supplier, but I was on the understanding Megs glaze went on last. Just bought a bottle of Megs glaze and it says on the label that it is a polish and that you should apply a good wax after it. Not at all sure what to do now, since I have lots of P21S already on the car and don't want to strip it off by using this stuff.

Especially on approach to, and on roundabouts. There's nothing more annoying than waiting patiently on someone already on the roundabout to come past your entry point only for them to exit left at the last minute without a signal!

You won't regret your decision.