First we need to know what polish and wax you are using.
For polish, just wipe it around (if by hand) and let it haze a bit, then buff off when its hazed and dry. If it smudges its still not hazed and needs more working in (breaking down) before removing.
For wax, the time again depends, but usually, as soon as it starts to haze then buff it off. Give it varying times and see which works best with you. You should be able to buff it off in a few easy wipes. If it doesnt feel dry and it smudges, then you havent left it long enough. If it takes quite a bit of effort and rubbing, you've left it too long. Different waxes have different curing times. Any wax with a decent canuba content will also sweat. This means that you might need to go over the car again with a MF when you are done as it might look to have gone hazy again.
Its all trial and error really