You need to stop letting them give you the run around. Everyone has given you all the advice they can on here. Please take note of it and take some action.
Everytime you walk away they're laughing at you behind your back.
I agree that you shouldn't have walked away with the wheels damaged in the first place, forget even fitting them and driving around in them! I know you were excited about having the new wheels but honestly, you're going the completely wrong way about this.
I wouldn't have even let them go to get refurbed, I would have demanded a replacement set there and then. Not done any "deals" with the fitter and gone straight to management whilst I was there.
I hope you have recorded all the accounts of what has happened since the incident and are able to write a report to send to them.
If not then it's going to end up going round and round in circles...
I hope you get it sorted mate, but lesson learned!