Ricey

I knew I could rely on my faithful hound to notice! I've got not time for films now dawg! Its all power lunches, spreadsheets and liaising with people (effing 'liaising' for God sakes - I mean who the hell liaises....if I have to send anyone off to 'liaise' with someone I'm going to ensure in lieu of the word 'liaise' I'm going use the phrase 'oi softlad.....go and have a chat with that cretin in the other room and tell him to pull his finger out of his arse so we can get this done').

Anyone who's seen my more philosophical posts will know that I've a reasonable amount of contempt for the modern world and specifically the fact that good people get turned into mongtards by becoming middle management..........so I thought I'd go and get promoted into a middle managers job. ...........if you can't beat em..........mong em! And in true mongtard style I have been promoted to the official title 'Team Manage'r..........the first thing that was made clear to me is that I won't be managing a team or have any direct reports into me - the irony of it all actually puts a smile on my face. Anyways I've never bothered to apply before as it doesn't mean a payrise (still on pre-recession wages) and I hate the idea of managing a team day in day out so this is actually the job I've been waiting for, for a very long time - bits of projects, representing the department and general management monging about. Should be good..........expect a gradual but immediate deterioration in the quality of my posts - or if I actually retain my sanity a far more violent and vitriolic reaction when ever the office environment is mentioned! I love a good quote so as I embark on this journey I feel its only fitting that I use one of the great middle managers of our time; People see me, and they see the suit, and they go: "you're not fooling anyone", they know I'm rock and roll through and through. But you know that old thing, live fast, die young? Not my way. Live fast, sure, live too bloody fast sometimes, but die young? Die old. That's the way- not orthodox, I don't live by "the rules" you know. And if there's one other person who's influenced me in that way I think, someone who is a maverick, someone who does that to the system, then, it's Ian Botham. Because Beefy will happily say "that's what I think of your selection policy, yes I've hit the odd copper, yes I've enjoyed the old dooby, but will you **** off and leave me alone, I'm walking to John O'Groats for some spastics."

I've got to say mate that put a smile on my face!!!

In the words of Eddie Hitler 'its good for morale!'

mate..........searchy is your friend but as your new viewtopic.php?f=17&t=23843 There are tonnes off good guides on covering most subjects. It might be worth seeing if anyone is local to you for when you go to look at some Zeds..........and don't be put off travelling further afield that your local area - one of the forum members might be able to take a quick peek first to save you a trip.

(said in colloquial 'scum' accent of your locale)........E arrrr lads lets go and flame this lad for having a nice car......we can all pretend we think its dead chav, then we can go and cruise round in me Nova - its an SR with a Peco badge.......AV IT!!!!!!!!!!

Its not 'only a pet' its part of the family. I had to take 2 of our Degu's in the vets today.............little gits must of cost us over 2k since we got them and they're only glorified rats!

I had my roof down today, and some twongo pulled up along side me at traffic lights and called me a w4nker. Christ, i was minding my own and I get fricking abuse for it. WTF Gave him the birdy and left him standing at the lights. Always quite useful to either have a water pistol filled with urine in the car for these instances. Whilst I'm like driving Ms Daisy most of the time that kind of thing would incite me to leave the chimp in a cloud of rubber.

Buy some stick on crystals and go ghetto on our asses!

Cellotape a lock of hair to his windscreen and stab some scissors through his tyres..........its for the best. Generally anything with 2 seats gets referred to as a hairdressers car or birds car.........usually by fat toss pieces with seriously small todgers and mahusive 4x4's.

Not exactly uncommon thing to buy a car with finance on it though is it -this is from the AA website What to do if Finance is recorded The details of the agreement and the finance company are shown in the AA Car Data Check report. You should contact the finance company and ask if the agreement has been fully repaid. If it has, ask for written confirmation and only consider buying the vehicle once you have it. If it is outstanding, ask the vendor to obtain a settlement figure from the finance company (they will not supply this to you as it is considered to be personal data and is covered by Data Protection). You can confirm this figure with the finance company. You should then pay the outstanding sum directly to the finance company, and pay any balance to the vendor. If the settlement figure is greater than the asking price, both you and the vendor should pay the finance company together. The finance company should automatically contact Experian to remove the data from the vehicle.

cheap replacement if you just want the one http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Genuine-NISSAN-WH ... 2603wt_905

Mongtards but they've still got to be qualified haven't they. Surely worth the risk on a shed. Plus you can deck it out in half price Ripspeed kack while your waiting!

Left them silver.........and just spotted yesterday one that had come loose and was about to join yours down a grid somewhere!

You know what I normally dont like that kind of look at all..........but that really is the cats pajamas!

Thats a fair point I'd have to say.......they're just another thing thats been created to 'make life easier' but they inevitably just create more frustration and put someone out of a job.

Good to see your holding up mate. Keep up the hard work with the fundraising.

I'm 28 and I've been involved in 10 accidents (4 at fault and 6 not) - none through anyone driving like a **** - all through not paying enough attention - everyone involved has always been under 40............I'd have to say age quite often has feck all to do with it.

Offshore is alright provided whatever you need can be dealt with via a script and a nice easy generic conversation. Anything outside of the box and you've had your chips.

Just caught the story about Liam and the other 'Dogs of War' in the Sunday Express.........what a legend

The till weighs the goods when you put them in the bag, any discrepancy and it pauses the system and awaits help from the staff. You've misinterperted my point. If you don't scan it, there is no discrepancy with the weight of the items paid for He means if you try and do a Kansas city shuffle and stick it in your bag without scanning it the till will go bonkers at you. I assume that's how you meant scrotes would nick stuff.......sticking a bunch of bananas down your kecks wouldnt be too conspicuous!

blue for deffo mate

HOW MUCH! I thought 'my god thats crap I'll bet its £5.99 ' Thats chavalicious

The thing is Dave your generation at least can remember a time when things worked properly...........we've literally entered adulthood at a time when the world has been steadily devolving for 20 years so people and processes in general are much more convoluted and pointless. Its like being 25-30 year old Everton fan........you can't understand why anyone who's older gets out of their box when we don't qualify for Europe......when you've been brought up on relegation battles a comfortable mid table finish will do nicely. Same theory applies to life these days........if you get back home at the end of the day without being pushed to the point of screaming you should class it as a good day.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo my favorite forum Zed! Euthanasia FTW!