He's moving into my department and becoming my PA .
P didn't you say you would drop a turd on your bosses desk if you won the lottery, literally climb on their desk in front of them and do a number 2?!
No I'm moving to your department as a specialist troubleshooting executive/paperclip monitor.
I actually would use the poo as the cherry on the cake. Initially it would be several weeks of acting weirder and weirder to see how long you could last. In general order;
Week 1 - laugh a big belly laugh (hawhawhaw) at really inappropriate moments in important meetings.
Week 2 - When in trap one in the bogs make really, really loud pooing noises peppered with comments like 'help me unleash this demon!!!!' and 'sweet jesus its got ears!!!'
Week 3 - Use made up management sounding words that people may think are real - I think we need to simoultinflaxitionoiusly initiate that paratainiously when we conclusifax this prepropostion.
Week 4 - Cluck like a chicken whenever someone uses the word liaise.
Week 5 - Wear more and more extravagant clothes to work (still 'work wear') - a bright green suit with a dog tooth shirt and a feather behind your ear.
Week 6 - Dress down day in a pair of running shorts with a salami stashed in them.