Zummertor Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Just completed removing the Christmas dec.s etc. and found these cracker jokes lying around so had to share them, last of the season. Q. Why is a football stadium so cool ? A. Because it is full of fans. Q. Why can't your nose be 12 inches long ? A. Because it would be a foot. Q. What do you call a lazy skeleton ? A. Bone idle. and very finally as I'm struggling to type these in Q. What do you get when you cross a dog with a chicken ? A. A hen that lays pooched eggs. Oh, why oh why did I type those up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndySpak Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martinmac Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Glad its only once a year Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mbs Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 not even worth half a and Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZeddZ Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 They are woeful.Surely at least a weeks ban is in order. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holly Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 I laughed , Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexx Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 I think I had the same set of crackers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jim Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Agreed - these are bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GIXXERUK Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H5 Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 They are woeful.Surely at least a weeks ban is in order. +1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zedrush Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 I think I laughed out of charity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndySpak Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Not heard from Zummer again.... has he actually been banned? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuey Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 I think I laughed out of charity i think you laughed coz youve just seen a pic of your hair in the road on this thread............ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinbad Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 :lol: I laughed more at everyones replies! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zummertor Posted January 7, 2008 Author Share Posted January 7, 2008 thinking about setting up a new id. How about "two elephants fell of a cliff, boom boom (to be said in a Basil Brush voice)" ? Does that help ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
P15UL T Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 do you need another spade yet as that hole your digging is getting awful big Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martinmac Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Will send you a little something with the calendar. A book someone sent me a few years ago. Some crackers in it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GIXXERUK Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Will send you a little something with the calendar. A book someone sent me a few years ago. Some crackers in it. send it SOON FOR GODS SAKE !!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinbad Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Will send you a little something with the calendar. A book someone sent me a few years ago. Some crackers in it. He doesnt need crackers, he needs some good Jokes!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmmackfc Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 thinking about setting up a new id. How about "two elephants fell of a cliff, boom boom (to be said in a Basil Brush voice)" ? Does that help ? How many jokes you posted Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinbad Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 thinking about setting up a new id. How about "two elephants fell of a cliff, boom boom (to be said in a Basil Brush voice)" ? Does that help ? How many jokes you posted Here you go jst for you! abit dirty so apologies: A man was in a long line at his local Tesco store. As he got to the check out he realised he had forgotten to get condoms, so he asked the checkout girl if she could have some brought up to the register. She asked, "What size condoms?" The customer replied that he didn't Know. She asked him to drop his pants. He did. She reached over the counter, grabbed hold of him and called over the intercom, "One box of large condoms, Checkout 5." The next man in line thought this was interesting, and like most of us, was up for a cheap thrill. When he got up to the check out, he told the girl that he too had forgotten to get condoms, and asked if she could have somebrought to the check out for him. She asked him what size, and he stated that he didn't know. She asked him to drop his pants. He did. She gave him a quick feel, picked up the intercom and said, "One box of medium-sized condoms, Checkout 5." A few customers back was this teenage boy. He thought what he had seen was way too cool. He had never had any type of sexual contact with a live female, so he thought this was his chance. When he got to the check out he told the girl he needed some condoms. She asked him what size and he said he didn't know. She asked him to drop his pants and he did. She reached over the counter, gave him a quick squeeze then picked up the intercom and said................. "Mop and bucket to Checkout 5" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmmackfc Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinbad Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Thank god!! Zummertor - You can keep the book! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martinmac Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 Two blondes walked into a building. Would have thought one of them would have missed it. Off to play with tankers now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zummertor Posted January 8, 2008 Author Share Posted January 8, 2008 Two blondes walked into a building. Would have thought one of them would have missed it. Off to play with tankers now I hope he's good at speeling. and come on these jokes are "crackers" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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