I like the Geordie version. Straight to the point!
Seriously though, I would be ready to tear them a new one at the time, well done for keeping your cool!
IMO I'd go with something like the Ekona letter, but I'd be more direct about the solution. Tell them what you want to do, that you suggest you get quotes to repair the damage and that you expect them to pay for it. Add in photos of the exact issues too to show them the problem. If you can get the quotes quickly include them in the letter and deliver the whole thing in one blow, but if it will take a while best get the complaint in first and follow up with the quotes.
Oh and call them up first if you haven't already to make sure you have the address details and to find out what their complaints procedure is exactly.
You're probably looking at a washer fix plus a professional detail to repair any surface scratches etc. Hopefully nothing more than that.
If all goes well you'll get the problems put right and a full polish, seal and wax to make up for the hassle.