As above.
1 Yes, the headlamp washers wash the headlamps, front wings, bonnet, windscreen, roof, boot and the car behind ("washing" the car behind is my new favourite game to play on absolutely anyone who is tail gaiting me. Just hold the lamp washer switch until they back off )
2 Yes, just let the revs drop a little and it will be easier on the box and your wallet in the long run. I find going from 1st to 2nd, I come out of first, go for second and hold it against the gate, when the revs drop enough it pops in.
3 Yes, works fine with all iphones. There is a manual available for download somewhere on here with all the commands. Just get used to hearing "Pardon!?!" quote a lot.