lomoto Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Third post down ,, as Victor says " I dont believe it !!" http://www.vxronline.co.uk/messageboard ... .php?t=714 Quote
Digsy Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Third post down ,, as Victor says " I dont believe it !!" http://www.vxronline.co.uk/messageboard ... .php?t=714 Often I put the rear seats flat, this reduces weight. (Like why you crawl flat across a frozen pond so as not to break the ice). What a complete arse! Quote
Stew Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 If only we had rear seats to fold down, then we could bbreak the 4 second to 60 barrier. You 'shave a couple of seconds off the standard time' by running with an empty glove box! Quote
nixy Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 I wish I'd known all that information sooner! Instead of having golf gti's in the past and a type R I could have carried less fuel, put my seats down and just bought the badges instead! doh! Quote
rickya Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Thats is just hilarious lolololololololololol It has to be a joke!!! Please: "Often I put the rear seats flat, this reduces weight. (Like why you crawl flat across a frozen pond so as not to break the ice)" or better still "The car is always clean improving aerodynamic progress" :teeth: Quote
Chris`I Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Thats the funniest thing I've heard in ages If only we had back seats to fold down. I'm off to take my carputer out, that laptop in my glovebox must be worth at least a second 0-60 Quote
Chesterfield Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Sadly not a joke, I remember being directed to this thread mid last year and having a good old chuckle. The thread was then several pages long, and contained many more colourful insults - its still a funny read though. I reckon next time Im at weight watchers Ill lie flat on the scales instead of standing upright - that'll make all the difference - come on gold star! Quote
nixy Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 If I could be arsed to find the laughing smiley I'd be laughing at that weight watchers comment! Quote
H5 Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 If I could be arsed to find the laughing smiley I'd be laughing at that weight watchers comment! <- typed. Quote
Chesterfield Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Im working on the smilies - if I could remember how to re-order them Id do it now just for you. Quote
H5 Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Im working on the smilies - if I could remember how to re-order them Id do it now just for you. Ah thanks! Just doing our bit for the good of the masses! As for the comments, what a plonker. Quote
Chris`I Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 What a yoghurt top he his! Stop watching Big Brother, you're meant to be out washing and waxing the car every night Quote
Dan Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 Gotta say, I have a mate who is bonkers just like this guy. Last year he picked me up in an Elise and told me he had "weighed the fuel and polished the bonnet to reduce drag". I cracked up laughing, not least because it was ME he was picking up thus rendering all weight saving measures completely redundant It took me about an hour to get in the damned thing and of course I am still there, this is a laptop with a wireless connection, my diet consists of drive thru take aways and I go to the toilet through a small plastic tube... Quote
nixy Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 I'm still laughing! I read it again and I loved the bit about keeping it clean to improve aerodynamics. I mean, all those dead flies must weigh a ton! Quote
H5 Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 They're not that bad mate, it's all worth it when you get in them! Quote
nixy Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 he forgot to mention that if you go for a poo before getting in the car it will be even lighter and therefore faster! Oh and empty your pockets as well, that helps. Quote
lomoto Posted August 8, 2007 Author Posted August 8, 2007 he forgot to mention that if you go for a poo before getting in the car it will be even lighter and therefore faster! Oh and empty your pockets as well, that helps. Also when driving ., recline your seats all the way back Quote
Digsy Posted August 8, 2007 Posted August 8, 2007 If you bounce up and down on your seat all the time whilst driving you will be in the air for a certain percentage of your journey and thus for that time the car will weigh less. Superb! Quote
sinbad Posted August 16, 2007 Posted August 16, 2007 Sadly not a joke, I remember being directed to this thread mid last year and having a good old chuckle. The thread was then several pages long, and contained many more colourful insults - its still a funny read though. I reckon next time Im at weight watchers Ill lie flat on the scales instead of standing upright - that'll make all the difference - come on gold star! +1 what an idiot!! Quote
bugglet Posted August 16, 2007 Posted August 16, 2007 If he'd said that he put the seats down to lower the centre of gravity rather than "reduce the weight" you might be able to forgive him for being a total plonker rather than a complete moron! As for polishing it, this would make sense if you were after an extra 1000th of a second to beat Hamilton to pole position, but in a Corsa????? Pleaaaaaaase! Love it, sent it to every petrol head I know!! Quote
Zedrush Posted August 16, 2007 Posted August 16, 2007 I just read it what a dick. Unfortunatly it seems all the banter has been taken off Quote
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