twobears

Most of the women from my Aqua Aerobics class are off to watch this tonight and they are all septuagenarians. I hope the film isn't too 'exciting' for the old girls Personally, I think the idea of being dominated by some ginger haired bloke is revolting. Well, I guess the colour of his hair doesn't really matter but the other bit doesn't appeal in the slightest. Being spanked or whatever really isn't a fetish of mine As for helpless poor girl falling under the spell of a man who 'just happens' to be wealthy, er, yawn

I am still, unbelievably, trying to decide where to live and making no headway whatsoever So far I have looked at Surrey, Dorset, Hampshire, Sussex and Suffolk. I am off to Kent in a couple of weeks when Mr Twobears gets back from Spain to see if I like it there. All the places I've visited have their good and bad points but I am not getting 'the feeling', you know the one you get when something feels 'right' I have even started looking again at houses in East Yorkshire where my current house is located even though I said I wanted to move from Yorkshire. What is wrong with me? I am normally pretty decisive but now it seems I have had a personality transplant and can't come to a decision at all Maybe I should throw the question open to the forum and let you lot decide where I live? Please don't all rush to warn me off living within 20 miles of the town where you live

Aw, your wife/gf is lovely and her little dog is really cute No advice on the YouTube thing though as I am way too old. Sorry

He's done well if he's found a beach in Madrid Good tip re not unscrewing the rods accidentally. I bet I would have done that

I think that the problem is much worse when it's been raining so that could possibly be the answer? I watched them doing the work and it all seemed sound. The pipes are big bore things and the joints looked fine and all laid on sand with gravel underneath if I am remembering correctly? They took lots of readings with a laser thingy all along the channel and it seemed very professional, even though it was a tiny job for them compared to their normal line of work. I will be very annoyed if it is faulty workmanship because it cost me a serious amount of money as they had to dig out a heck of a lot of hedging and some small trees and I also opted for several tons of top soil to be brought to the site to make it level because the drains were laid in an existing depression that had become choked with vegetation. I want to get on with trying to fix it now so I hope the weather is good on Sunday because my daughter is dragging me to Harrogate tomorrow. Why is Mr Two Bears in Spain when I need him?

Thanks everyone Have decided not to use canes now Andy Will ring farmer's brother tomorrow and see if he has any rods that I can use before getting myself to Screwfix. When in Yorkshire I do like to adapt to their parsimonious ways Definitely not frozen drains WW. If they were frozen they might not smell as much! I think there are traps under both the smelly drains but I may have to dig down a bit to see

Ebized, the drainage pipes at the front are solely for the rainwater coming off the front of the house and I have checked that the soil pipe, one of which is also at the front, doesn't run into these drains but is is the 'rainwater drains' that smell and not the soil pipe one. That is why I am so confused really There is one drainpipe at the back of the house that definitely goes into the klargester but the ones from the front go straight forward and into the new drain pipes and the bath water etc goes though different pipes (another manhole cover that I checked) into the klargester chamber. I have the septic tank emptied regularly and it never gets full because it has the pump to pump out the water whilst the effluent sinks to the bottom. The septic tank people always tell me that there is nothing much in the tank to empty so I don't think that is a problem. I had to have a new pump fitted a while back but I've checked and it is still working ok. Definitely no waste matter in the 'rainwater drains' just mud which smells horrid but is not sewage (and I've unblocked the sewers many times now when visitors have put things into them) so I'm certain of that. Drainage is not shared with anyone.Hopefully the drainage was done correctly, fingers crossed The firm normally does massive drainage projects on commercial and industrial sites so I think they are trustworthy. Hope so anyway or it will be awkward confronting them as they are my near neighbours in this tiny hamlet I will rod the drains at the weekend and give them another good blast with my jet wash and see if things improve next week. I'm only here for another few days so I really need to get this problem sorted!

Ekona, I don't think they are putting fat down the sink because I have always dinned it into them that they must never do that but I will have another word with them

Possibly but the pipes are only 4 years old so shouldn't fail so soon? I had them done by another farming friend who owns a drainage company but he is away at the moment so I can't get hold of him

Thanks Keyser If I move to Dorset please can your mate be my mate too?

Thanks Atak for that link. I have just read Severn Trent's blurb and a right riveting read it was Because we have no mains drainage I think I am on my own with this one.

Thanks Arkwright Unfortunately we have no soakaways because they have all collapsed due to age/extremely high water table (we are on a flood plain although have never flooded) and have never been re-instated because they simply won't work. All our surface water goes into the pipes that were fitted a few years ago and finish up in a gully at the bottom of the orchard. Due to the slope of the land, the grey water from the klargester also ends up here, in a muddy pool. Not ideal but everywhere round here is waterlogged for most of the year I've already got someone to empty the bath whilst I watched and the water did go into the drains and I followed it down the orchard, lifting up the manhole covers as I went, so that all seems ok but I still can't figure out why it is smelling I think there is more debris down there than I have dislodged so I may have to try to fashion some rods from long garden canes and see if this will dislodge any blockages? I may have simply moved the debris along with my jet washer? Water is definitely coming into the big drainpipes but is it all of the water I wonder? I will have another go tomorrow. I thought I had cleared the problem the other day but it has come back worse than ever

I went with Mr Two Bears to a massive car show on International Drive a couple of years ago. It was awesome to see the monster trucks and they kindly let me climb up into them so they could laugh at me but I loved it. I think the secret is to fill up on breakfast so that you save money on lunch. Our hotel had the most enormous choice (as well as huge portions) and I couldn't actually believe that some Americans think piles of whipped cream is a good plan for breakfast time Avoid 'grits' unless you enjoy eating wallpaper paste

Thanks Andy. House isn't actually empty - just got two twenty somethings living in it who aren't very keen on house maintenance it would seem

No he is definitely a proper plumber because he works for my farming friends and they can't praise him enough. I think maybe he just didn't want to go out in the cold. DynoRod are useless here. I've had them out before and they charged me a lot of money for doing a job that I discovered I could do myself and even perversely enjoy I have a talent for unblocking sewers it seems Thanks 350zedd, will Google 'gulley traps' as I'm not sure what they are. Will have another go at removing the mud that seems to have made the pipes back up and see how it goes. I think that moss and leaves have probably caused the mud to settle in the drains because I've not been around to do household maintenance

Do plumbers do 'outside stuff'? My other problem, which I should have mentioned, is that, being remote, I can't get tradesmen to agree to come out The only ones that are keen to come here are cowboys and I have been ripped off a few times now and am anxious to avoid that happening again. I did have a plumber in the house last week to see if he could fix the broken shower (house is falling down since I left it a year ago) but he said he didn't do drains. He has also not returned to do the work on the shower which is what normally happens when I try to get tradesmen to do work. I might have another go myself with the jet wash when I get home this afternoon but I am not quite sure what I am doing.

If Ghostbusters are unavailable I'm not sure who to call? I'm up in Yorkshire until the end of next week to sort out maintenance on my cottage and there is a problem with the drains. They smell horrible! The smell comes and goes but it definitely needs to go for good. The problem that I have is that we are not on mains drainage so Dyno Rod etc would be useless. All I can think of is to get hold of the people who installed the new drainage a few years ago for me. The cottage is very old and the original drains had long since failed so we had new pipes installed from the downpipes at the front of the house which run all the way down to the end of the property via larger drainpipes with two inspection covers en route. If I lift the manhole covers the smell is there but no water or other debris but the drains at the front, just outside the door seem to be blocked with smelly mud which I have jetted with my pressure washer but this only improved things briefly. We have a septic tank, well a Klargester, which has been emptied recently and this also flows into the drainage system (grey water only or that is what it is supposed to be) and this is 'downstream' of the drains by the front door. I am wondering if the septic tank discharge could be flowing back towards the house but I can't really see how as there is a gentle fall right down the orchard (where the septic tank discharge comes out) and water doesn't flow uphill unless it is pumped surely? Any ideas please on who I need to call if I can't get hold of the original drain installers? Am going to try them again today but not actually sure if they do maintenance or just installation.

Well that didn't do much for his garden did it?

The poor horse, and then having to show his shiny bit too Actually, and you won't like this , if the horse does get his bits out when you are showing, some people whack it with their showing cane to make the poor horse put it away quick smart I've got a mare now so no worries on that front but my old horse was terrible for getting, erm, over excited

leonk, that is just yukky My cleaner tried putting the dogs' bowls in the dishwasher. She only did it the once Have to admit to putting horse's bit in there after scrubbing it with a scourer first. It does get it lovely and shiny if you are showing

Thanks everyone. I think I have made the wrong decision re the insurance haven't I? I've decided to do as everyone suggests and get them to come and fix it this time and then cancel the insurance and save up some money for emergencies instead. Wendy, I haven't got room for a separate dryer, unfortunately, because I have two washing machines side by side instead. The washer dryer is for human clothes and the other, which is a washer only, is for horse rugs/numnahs/dog/cat bedding etc that I wouldn't want in the 'human' washing machine. I am just wondering what is going to break next as I normally find that all my household appliances go kaput at the same time

The dryer on my combination washer dryer has stopped working so I called the insurers and they said the excess has now gone up to £50 so I was wondering if it was worth calling them out or if I should cancel the policy and try to find someone local and independent (assuming such a person exists)? I pay £15.99 for the policy per month and it was recommended on MoneySavingExpert but now I feel as though I might be better just saving the money every month and putting it into an 'appliance breakdown fund'? Anyone knowledgeable on these matters? I seem to be spending all my time here in Yorkshire sorting out problems instead of doing the decorating that I am here to do!!

I have no neighbours to the side where I would ideally like to build or at least not for a mile so,hopefully, no-one would object except my neighbour the other side who would also not be affected in the slightest but who likes to moan as a sort of hobby

Not sure if is a police matter but it is inconsiderate. I had to take my young daughter home to get changed when she was soaked head to foot by a driver as I pushed her to nursery school many years ago. I was pretty annoyed as I couldn't let her sit in wet clothes all day so I missed my bus to work because I had to go home to change her and I got told off for being late for work

No, the old one featured more beards, although that might be misinterpreted?