Huh, what year is your car? You appear to have facelift wiring, facelift bumper, but pre-facelift headlights. It's easier on the original DE, cos there's only 1 connector there.
As for which connector, I've never touched that block of 3, but unplugging the light grey connector in the first pic brings up the ABS, VDC and slip lights on the dash. Haven't tried the darker grey connector next to it, but it might work, try and see what happens - I just guessed and pulled one, but that doesn't mean it's the right one.
Alternatively, unplugging the cylindrical black connector from the big metal ABS block itself also seems to work.