Emperor Ming

Hi Guys and Gals Sorry its been so long since I called in. I have been menaing to call in and say hello for ages but always seem so flippin busy. No escuses I should have called in ages ago. Anyhow i have some news. I advertised the Zed just over a month ago and got a good price for her. She actually went to a guy who lives and works in Sheffield only a few miles away. I have been running around in a little Hyundai Lantra Estate which cost me the grand total of £400. I have been scouring the internet and Mrs Ming gave me a bolloking on Friday and told me to go out and start looking for a proper car. Like I needed telling twice. Anyhow after a couple of lemons I dropped on this http://atsearch.autotrader.co.uk/uvl/po ... distance=0 (Sorry. Tried to get the picture to come up but failed!!) Went for a test drive and fell instantly in love. The V10 diesel is a stonking engine and the ride and 'urge' for a 2.5 tonne car is awsome. The figures make pretty good reading too Fuel Consumption (Urban) 16.5 mpg Fuel Consumption (Extra-Urban) 28.8 mpg Fuel Consumption (Combined) 23 mpg 0-62mph 7.8 seconds (you want to see the 30 to 60 and 70 to 100 figures) Top Speed 140 mph (In a 2.5 tonne car ) Cylinders 10 Number of Valves 20 V Engine Power 313 bhp MMmmmmmmm!!! Engine Torque 553 lbs/ft I cannot believe the level of gadgets but 'Air conditioned glove box' takes some beating together with 'keyless entry and exit' (You have the keys in your pocket and as you approach the car it unlocks itself and as you walk away it locks itself???) Anyway sheckles changed hands and after al ittle work I hope to collect her on Friday. It is a vewry different ride to the Zed and to be fair that is what I wanted as the Zed was my third sports car and I wanted a change. I could not however buy something without a decent amount of performance. I am off to cornwall in 10 days time and am looking forward to trying it out on a long run. Hell its a long time until friday. Ming the Excited.

Thanks guys Strange thing is, now I no longer have a family, I want A BIG car. LOL The things you do for a dog eh!! Got to have loads of grunt though and the ability to go reasonably quickly. Its odd though. Once you have had a big engined car its very difficult to drive anything else. Gonna test drive a few and see which one I like the feel of. Almost certainly if it is a Touareg it will be the 4.2 petrol or the 5 litre diesel. I will of course keep you guys posted and post up pictures before and more importantly AFTER a full detail!! Mmmmmmmm Ming the excited

Yup If it can pull a jumbo jet it can pull my dog!! LOL I fancy black with all the chrome bits! At least I will have plenty to polish eh! Ming the hopeful

I quite fancy one of these. Any ideas what it is in? Not driven one yet but that is the next step. Gonna buy a tatty estate car for a month or two to go look at some and see what turns up! Ming the Excited (Dont tell Mrs Ming)

Hi guys I am afraid it is time to say good bye to the Zed. She has done me stirling service for 3 years but like most petrol heads I just need a change. I also have 'Murphy' my 7 stone mastiff and both he and Mrs Ming don't fit into the Zed. I advertised her 10 days ago and got a firm offer Monday morning. Mrs Ming is not speaking to me because of all my sports cars she fell for the Zed and really does not want me to sell it. The new owner will be collecting her in about 10 days time when I have sorted out the number plate and got back from a walking trip in scotland. I have enjoyed the experience and would recommend a Zed to anyone in the market for a sports tourer. She has run faultlessly and is a pleasure to drive but I really need a 'dog' space in the back. The guy who is buying her tried both an Audi TT and an SLK Merc and he was of the oinion that the Zed was very superior to both. I will recommend the site to him and will still pop in from time to time myself. (Hell I still visit the GTO site and I sold mine 5 years ago) I have enjoyed the company on here and much of the lively debate. Your mate Ming

Many years ago in Northern Ireland I was on Airfield patrol. We had to keep driving all night and our Sgt and Flight Sergeant could see all the airfield from their office so it was almost impossible to park up and catch 40 winks. We used to drive old soft top 2.2 diesel landrovers. I found that if you put it on full lock, put your hand through the steering wheel and sat on your hand, put it in seond gear and pulled the manual choke out half way it would happily go round in circles all evening. from the office it looked like we were driving around the aircraft taxi area (The airfield did not fly at night so we were just guarding the military aircraft) What I didnt realise was that this taxi area was on a slight slope and after half an hour I was woken by a massive crunch as my landrover smashed into an aircraft hanger!! Try explaining that one!! Ming the tired

Thanks mate Never far away but busy busy busy so dont post very often!! Ming the Flat out

I have just sent a couple of messages to Chilli Red and thought this would be a good topic for a thread. I will start it off. As a kid I was found in the shed by my mum when I was about 6 or 7 with a packet of digestive biscuits and an opened tin of white paint dunking the biscuits into the paint like fresh milk and then eating them (Fortunatley not lead based paint!!) or there was the time ................. Trying to remove some brake fluid from an over full resevoir having changed the pads I decided that putting a pipe into the resevoir and sucking up gently might make it a bit easier. The mouth full of brake fluid was dangerous enough but on checking with the Dr I found that the medication I was on made it MUCH more serious. Fortunately I lived to fight another day. Ming the lucky I am sure there are loads more but over to you guys for now.

I did this a month ago and when I had finished - a good 9 hours later - the owner, a pleasant lady, said to me. Well thats it cleaned for another year then, paid up and drove off. At least I will have my work cut out when she comes back Ming the Puzzled

I have a scratch down my passenger door and took it to the shop that did my bonnet as there was a chance the a*sehole that did it was going to have to pay ompo - he didn't in the end but thats another story - and they quoted £1150. The scratch is only down to the undercoat and no metal shows and in most lights you can hardly see it. What would they have wanted for a re spray. LOL Ming the muddled PS i am sure that it can be repaired and sprayed for substantially less than the first quote though.

Agreed Husky however the size of the roughness is also very important as it has to stay within the Boundary layer. If the roughness protrudes through this layer then it can effect the flow of the air adversely - I THINK!! - . If I have read it right then it is also of importance to have certain areas rougher than others. Hell i left science class 35 years ago!! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cylinder_head_porting (about half way down) Ming the Muddled

Just looked on Wikepedia and found this For example, consider the flow of air over an airplane wing. The boundary layer is a very thin sheet of air lying over the surface of the wing (and all other surfaces of the airplane). Because air has viscosity, this layer of air tends to adhere to the wing. As the wing moves forward through the air, the boundary layer at first flows smoothly over the streamlined shape of the airfoil. Here the flow is called laminar and the boundary layer is a laminar layer. When designing piping systems, turbulent flow requires a higher input of energy from a pump (or fan) than laminar flow. Kinda wished I had never asked now!! LOL My head hurts.

Not sure if I understand the science but I do have an idea what it means. When they used to polish the inlet ports of two strokes they used to smooth out all the bumps and moulding marks and then slightly roughen up the surface - as in a mild wet and dry accross the surface roughening up - as apparently it sped up air flow. Not sure if a rough surface would have the same effect though! The price seems good and anything that helps keep the air cool, and as such denser and more oxygen heavy, on induction has to be good. I will be interested in the results. Ming the Wondering

Hi Guys Just picked up on this thread and seen the pics of the plenum. It looks awsome on the outside. I had a thought though, flame me if i have missed this somewhere else as I flicked through the 23 pages, but if the underside is so rough might it not cause air flow problems? From my days tinkering with motor cycle indiction stuff we always strived for smooth ports to allow smooth air flow. Might it not be beneficial to smooth out the inside as well to allow the air to pass through cleanly? It might even be worth making two. One rough and one smooth and dyno run them both on the same engine to see if there is a difference. Just a thought. I am sure a techie on here ill put me straight! Ming the Thoughtful. PS Did I miss a price cos I think they are cool and if proved to be at least as good as standard I might well be interested.

DTE is definately Distance To Empty. On my car as soon as the empty light comes on the guage drops to empty and the DTE light flashes with a figure. Never had it down to zero but got close once Try keeping the tank at half full and see if it makes a difference. It might be that the sender unit is paertially bunged up somewhere and when the fuel drops to a certain level it plays up.. Pointless changing something until you know it is goosed Ming the frugal

I am in the process of getting my teeth sorted before I retire. 4 new fillings and two old ones to take out and replace so 6 in total. The big one has been done with NO INJECTION and unless the dentist insists I will not have the needle for the others. I hate the injection and the after pain much more than the drilling!! It's not a big brave thing I just HATE the injections. The next one is wednesday!! Ming the ready

ebay lots and lots on there and only about a tenner. Ming the knowledgable

It depends what you want but you will not beat Dave Naxton for detailing he really is as good as it gets. Look on www.detailingworld.co.uk and do a search for his name I guarantee you will be impressed. He also has his own web site Hope this helps Ming the Polisher

Take this man to a cliff, hang him by fishing line and hooks attached to his tranclements well over the edge and then pull him up and down SLOWLY. How can anything so iconic be classed in the same breath as the CAPRI??????? Public excution is too quick for him!! Ming the Amazed

LOL With my plate I would be a bit of a hypocrite to say the least!! LOL Ming the Honest

sonus 3 compound with a yellow sonus pad and worked the polish hard at 4500 rpm. Then sped it up to 6000 when the polish turned and then cloth polished the residue. The paint corrected quite well and as such I hand applied autoglym and the carnuba wax. That little tool came from ebay with a few other little attachments and plugs into any hoover mate. £9:99 if my memory serves me correctly and great for air vents and those annoying little bits by the seatbelts and chair sides that you cant get to. saw the shogun again today and although a little dusty it still looked good next to all the other vehicles. My mate has a 5 litre 7 series BMW and I soooooooo want to do his car. It would look a million dollars if done properly as opposed to looking like a skip refugee. LOL Ming the Shineyman

No pic of the pizza as I devoured it!! LOL It was on the fusion side of nuclear in the chilli stakes but not as spicy as the head pizza chef normally makes them. None the less awsome and i am suffering a little today. ming the Happy PS Just got back from the poker game and although I bummed out of ther main game with a bit of bad play i settled down in the cash game and made £60 so in profit for the day Just jumped in the shower and going out to the hog roast!!! ming the hungry

Just spent two days sorting out my mates Shogun. When it turned up I thought it was black LOL Turns out its a nice metallic blue. Outside. Pressure rinse, snow foam(cherry), pressure rinse, wash (meguirs shampoo), rinse, clay bar, wash (meguirs), pressure rinse, sonus no3 with the porter cable polisher, lots of buffing, hand polished with autoglym (i know its not flavour of the month but I like it and on a good surface it comes up well) P21 Carnuba wax to finish (again by hand) All exterior trim with meguirs tyre shine on a cloth by hand. Inside lots and lots of vaccuuming and time with my little detailing tool. Auto glym vinyl treatment. All leather cleaned (auotglym leather cleaner) and then treated (Autoglym leather treatment cream.) Just short of 14 hrs work and 30 cups of tea!! here's a few pics to show the results of my efforts. As I got her cleaning her My new tool for little nook and crannies after 1st proper wash And some shiney stuff my favourite a couple more Ming the tired

My good lady is on the way back from the italian restuarant she works in with a 'rocket fuel' pizza to go with the brandy. It cant get better. Ming the contewnt.

Sounds great!! LOL i am at present having a pre real weekend drink of a fine brandy!! Oh how us old blokes live life to the full eh!! Ming the Imbiber