Cara

Can I just clear up that I didn't actually write those, it's from one of those jokey forwarded emails I got today, I know I'm a moan but I'm not THAT bad (shut it....) (Oh and poor Doug nothing! ) In saying that, I identify with most of them...

Hmm, think this is an appropriate smiley for you stan - There is far too much talk of cake on the forum this afternoon

Yes but from what I hear you are the site's cake supplier...... she bakes 'em, you peddle 'em

An email I had forwarded to me this morning... But seeing as you ask, yes, bring on the cake (chocolate preferable please)

I opened up the link and immediately thought 'ugh' (I think it's the colour though more than anything else, not a fan) but it is strangely growing on me. Mint car

12 THINGS I HATE ABOUT PEOPLE 1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time..... I know where my watch is pal, where the f**k is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually. 3. When people say "oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". F**king right! What good is a cake if you can’t eat it? 4. When people say "its always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the f**k would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? 5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that"? No tosser, I paid £10 to come to the cinema and stare at the f**king floor. 6. People who ask "can I ask you a question?" Didn’t really give me a choice there, did you sunshine? 7. When something is "new and improved" which is it? If its new, then there has never been anything before it. If its an improvement, then there must have been something before it so its not new. 8. When people say " life is short" - what the f**k?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever f**king does!! What can you do that’s longer? 9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "has the bus come yet?" If the bus came would I be standing here, knob-head? 10. People who say things like "My eyes aren't what they used to be". So what did they used to be? Ears? Wellington boots? 11. When your eating something and someone asks "is that nice?" - no its really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate. 12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that’s an image I really didn’t need.

How ace I'm so going to have to remember to do this next time baking/cooking!

Yes I know, you're completely right. We're the sad ones... Woohoo, we're rare!

Aw thanks very much Stew (now, remind me, where do I send your bribery payment? )

You see, that's what forum chatting does, makes you think you know someone when in reality you could bump into each other in the street and not have a clue! (until having met at a meet of course!) I'd have waved if I'd been driving the Z, that would have made more sense

There's a few on here Rob, myself included, and some more long-standing members including Nixy and Bronzee. And more joining all the time... (shh...we're taking over.... )

Pmsl excellent idea - type in Doric when wanting to hide things from the non-Aberdonians.... muhahaha!!

I did, car looking and sounding good For a split second, when I saw the reg and clicked, I was going to wave... then I thought hold on, don't be daft, you'd be thinking who's that random on the street waving

I wonder to how many people that just reads like a foreign language!

Chris? At 7pm last night on Union Street, driving past Soul bar but on the opposite side. I was walking up the road on my way to meet a friend for dinner, so if you spotted somebody doing a 360 gawping at the car that was me

Nope Welcome Rory

Now that's what I call keeping it in the family, excellent! Speaking on behalf of the women car lovers (and I'm sure Nixy and Bronzee will back me up on this), I really think you should let your daughter have a go, isn't it universally known that females are the better drivers (don't know why I can't keep my mouth shut on a predominantly male forum ) Hopefully Martin's wee tutorial will allow you to get some pics up for us all.

Some of those are hilarious - sad thing is, I can quite believe some of those being real answers given these days

Hi Rob, I think it's fab how you've got the sport running in the family Look forward to some photos.

(also, 167 views... 10 replies... )

An Irish farmer named Seamus had a car accident. In court, the lorry company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Seamus. 'Didn't you say to the Police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor. Seamus responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favourite cow, Bessie, into the...' 'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?' Seamus said, 'Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road....' The solicitor interrupted again and said, 'Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud Please tell him to simply answer the question.' By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Seamus's answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie'. Seamus thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the road when this huge lorry and trailer came through a stop sign and hit my trailer right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other.. I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans. Shortly after the accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes. Then the policeman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, 'How are you feeling?' 'Now what the F*c k would you say?'

Welcome Hannah Get some photos up of the new addition!

I get this frequently too, it's freaky. Today, it was Imprezas (though I shouldn't really be surprised, considering the amount of them here ) I was most disappointed not to spot another Z on my wee run today though!

+1 Maybe he's just friendly or perhaps address the Nixy/Cara type members of the forum! I have to say i didn't even notice the 'x' until pointed out by Beavis, well spotted! Perhaps a Saturday afternoon beverage had been consumed That is a brilliant price for the work