Ok to wrecked to read it all... if you decided to get one before I typed in here, well get another one.
Get a router that can do UPNP or DVLA complient from the wired link to the wireless... IMPORTANT! (future proofing anyway) I've got NTL/UPC or whatever they call themselves these days and they send a pretty decent Cisco router with their packages but, but, but it can't do UPNP via it's wired connection to the wireless = I've got a NAS with my musica and video yah and I want to be able for ALL my wireless devices to be able to play movs' music and vids... NEED something that can do UPNP via wired / wireles... In my case I had to re-install my old Asus router (WL500W) has a nice utorrent client built in and you can stuff it with a usb hard drive if you want to share stuff locally too. Anyway it does UPNP so can sit with my htc phone and play it all and use the nice controller feature...
as a side line > check out XBMC! IT's absolutely AWESOME...
(be sure to not enable upnp via the internet pipe though, not good if people on the internet finds you and start streaming... )